Middle School Newsletter – November 15, 2023

At the middle school level, we believe in "sweating the small stuff" by addressing relatively minor behaviors to prevent them from becoming more serious or habitual. It is normal for young adolescents to test limits and seek attention/approval, and they need timely feedback to know when they are bumping up against firm boundaries and expectations of behavior, language, etc. Typically, this involves a brief, corrective conversation and we have many of those each day as part of building and upholding community norms. 

The additional challenge is that so much of the students' interaction occurs beyond the eyes and ears of adults — via group chats, social media, etc. We work on empowering our kids to speak up in those moments and hold each other accountable, but that is a lot to expect at these ages. We also discuss the importance of using the adults in our building as resources. Students can be reluctant to speak up for fear of getting someone "in trouble" or being accused of "snitching," but we have many direct and indirect ways to approach these situations.  

As parents, you may hear things from your kids or see things on their phones or social media accounts that are concerning — mean comments, inappropriate or insensitive language, etc. Just as with situations that occur at school, I believe it is important that kids get corrective feedback and prevent escalation to more serious behaviors, consequences, and impact. You might choose to communicate and partner with other parents. I also encourage you to consider consulting with me, Middle School Counselor John Magner, or Director of Counseling Tracie Epes. This doesn't need to involve any action steps on our part, but we can discuss the situation and talk through some possible interventions. Again, the point is not to punish behavior but to stop anything inappropriate, support the development of our kids, and ensure that all of our spaces are safe and respectful. As noted in our 2023-24 Family Handbook, all interactions between our students are subject to our Community Standards and Policies, whether in-person or online.

There are many resources out there to help parents engage with kids' social media and online behavior. Here are a couple worth exploring:

• The Social Institute's Parent Toolkit — if you haven't already done so, click Activate Account and enter our school code: 0c68D8101A666E
• Common Sense Media's Family Engagement Toolkit